Tomorrow is Sam’s first ever birthday party… with friends… from his school. I was hesitant to throw him a party, unsure if other kids would come. I was nervous that if I invited his class, they would all find excuses not to attend the party. Sam’s therapist pushed me. She told me Sam was ready for a party. She told me Sam has friends.
So, I sucked up my fear and sent out the evite. Then I sat back and waited.
I clicked on the evite daily, just to see if anyone had RSVP’d. After a few days, responses starting coming in.
“No – we have other plans that day”
“No – we are out of town”
“Maybe – we will see if we can swing by”
One after the other the No’s came in. Then a Yes. But that was quickly changed to a no. Of the 18 kids from pre-school invited, only 3 said yes. And two will only be able to be there for an hour at most.
I know that Sam will not know the difference. He will just be happy that his buddy Emma is there. But I know. And it makes me sad.
Are people saying no because of Sam’s autism or are they saying no because they are all really that busy?
I don’t know the answer, the only thing I do know is I hope I get all my tears out tonight so I can act like everything is OK tomorrow for Sam at his birthday party that nobody is coming to.
Jen Pantoja says
Melissa- I am sending hugs and a bottle of wine. This has me in tears. I hate to invite myself but Naya and I would be honored to attend if u will have us. I just have to warn u that she hugs everyone a hundred times.
melragent says
You and Naya would be welcome… And the offer is so appreciated. The party is from 10-1 at Dracena park in Piedmont.
Jen Pantoja says
See u tomorrow š
Sharon says
Hi, Melissa,
This is your cousin by marriage, Sharon Salinger. Three children guests is the right number for a 3-year-old (1 guest per year of age), and an hour is probably long enough for a 3-year-old’s party. This info may not soothe your anxiety’s about the future, but if we are staying in the present moment, the outcome may be perfect. With love and admiration, Sharon