Separation Anxiety

I knew this day would come.  Eventually we would have to address separation anxiety.  I mean, eventually I would need to get back to work (or at least sort of).  Little did I realize that the person having the most trouble would be ME!

I think Sam is having more fun with the two different nanny’s than he is with me.  For instance, when I dropped him off yesterday with Lupita, he practically jumped out of my arms to get to her.  We would not even get him to look at me before I left.

I, on the other hand, am having a terrible time.  This break is temporary while I am working on a video shoot… but it is just terrible!  Not only is this the most time I have spent away from Sam for over a year… I also had to go out and rent the dreaded pump again!

With Irene, I stayed at home with her for the first 6 months, then returned to my full time job.  With Sam, I was on leave from September to May, and then made the decision to quit my job and just freelance, but only if I could work out of the house.  Well, this week and next week I am working crazy hours, and almost none of them are in the house.  It has meant putting Sam with day care, every day this week, and the type of day care where I am not in the next room.

Had you asked me before this week started, i would have told you how much I was craving a break from the stay-at-home/work-at-home mommy life I was living.  Let’s be honest, it can be isolating to be with a baby all day, every day.  But now that I have been apart from him, I am lonely.. I miss him.  I miss my play time.  I miss the tickle time.  More than that, I miss smiles, kisses and cuddles.